Music Monday #1: The Bad Touch

Welcome to the first of my Music Mondays! I decided to put my own slant on the Twitter meme by stitching some of my favourite lyrics. Well actually, I’d been wanting a regular feature here and had already stitched one of my favourite songs, but let’s not get caught up in the details shall we?

So, here we have a sadly as yet unframed and badly photographed (Sorry! Pic update tomorrow hopefully) cross stitch from The Bloodhound Gang’s The Bad Touch. Stitched on 14 count aida, if you’re interested.

For the uninitiated, here’s the song in all it’s video glory. (Possibly nsfw!)

I remember listening to this on the radio in my Nan’s car in the summer of 2000 I think, with her tapping her fingers on the wheel and nodding along. I choose to believe she never noticed the lyrics. I got hold of the Hooray For Boobies album and have loved The Bloodhound Gang ever since. They’re vile and witty and damn catchy. Go buy their albums!

So there you go. Expect some more musical stitchery soon. I’m hoping to do this at least once a month, but honestly who knows. And I’d love to see any Music Monday stitches you might come up with yourself. Post a link to your work in the comments if you make something.

Happy New Year

Happy New Year everyone! I hope you all had a great time ringing it in, and that you are happy and healthy in 2010. Oh ok, I hope you’re happy and healthy all your life, I won’t just limit it to 2010. See how nice I am?
I personally realised how old and “boring” I am. Hubby and I went to a party a friend had organised at the local Scout hut, which was crashed by a load of kids who were clearly underage, who were annoying, rude, stole people’s drinks and the girls took 20 minutes every time they went to the loo, two at a time, to snort something or other, I presume. One particularly irritating girl was escorted out with a nosebleed as we decided to leave just after 1 o’clock. The music was way too loud, and frankly I just wanted a cup of tea and a biscuit. So I popped to a fantastic Turkish shop that was still open and got some teabags, milk and biscuits. I’m sure this was very amusing for everyone else.

On the plus side, I got to see my fantastic friends, which was the reason for going anyway. I think this is the first time since 2000 that I’ve actually been out and with people for NYE. Every year since (that I can remember, correct me if I’m wrong) has been spent indoors either in bed asleep or just watching tv and going to bed just after midnight. Will I be partying like that again next year? No way Jose. I’d much rather have a few close friends round for dinner and a movie or playing on the Wii.

Now I don’t normally do new year’s resolutions. I think maybe last year I said I’d lose weight. And technically I did, I just put it all back on again. So I’ll be more specific this year.
1. Be healthy.
By this I mean have a good balanced diet, not an “I’ll only eat cabbage soup and salad and I want to lose 5 stones otherwise I’ve failed” diet. Of course I’m going to indulge sometimes. I like food, and giving up everything that’s bad for me forever just isn’t going to work. Today for example, I’m going to the pub with my friends for breakfast. I expect sausages and chocolate cake will be on offer, and I will gladly accept them. However, this is a once in a while thing. I also need to get some exercise. In fact, this is probably a bigger thing for me than eating. I will go out for walks when the weather gets a bit warmer (hey, at least I’m being honest about it. I’m not going for a stroll in this cold if I can help it!). I want to use my Wii Fit again, and try some of the dancing games out too. They look silly and fun.
So, this time in 2011, I want to feel and look and indeed actually be healthy. I want to feel physically comfortable in myself, and be happy, enjoying my life without beating myself up for liking cake and enjoying food. Because life is to be enjoyed.

2. Be neat and tidy.
I’m a messy person. I always have been. I’m starting to find it irritating myself, so something has got to change. I’ve already been putting this one into motion. I’m in the process of getting all my eternal pile of laundry done, and I’m honestly almost there. The living room is being gradually decluttered, as is the kitchen. There’s a significant difference already, and I just need to keep going at it and make it a permanent thing. It’s just simple things, like not leaving stuff lying around. Don’t leave things until tomorrow, do it now! Pick up that glass I’ve finished with and put it in the sink, you know? Once I’ve decluttered in the next week or so, I’m going to have a good, deep clean of the whole house, an early spring clean if you will. And then it’s just maintenance.

3. Be organised.
Yeah, everyone I know will tell you I suck at remembering birthdays, anniversaries, events in general. I’ve started using Google Calendar which has helped me remember a few birthdays in the past month or two. I also have a paper calendar to hang in my kitchen, and I’ll be getting myself a little diary to go in my handbag so I have no excuse not noting things down wherever I am.

4. Be craftier.
The indulgent one. I want to craft more, because I love it. I love the feeling of finishing a project, taking a step back and thinking “hell yeah, I made that.” It’s such an awesome feeling. I want to really try my hand at embroidery, I’ve done a few mini pieces in back stitch, but I’ve seen some really kick ass embroideries and I know I can make some awesome stuff too. Just need to get practicing! I also want to get sewing. Hubby got me a super sewing machine a year ago (Or was it two? Oh boy..) that I’ve seldom used. There are a few things I’ve seen on Craftster that I want to make for myself that will probably be good practice, and apparently they are easy. We shall see! The main thing I want is a nice bag that I can fit all my crap in. I really want to be able to carry a project with me so I can work on it during my breaks at work, but not be carrying around a massive Mary Poppins style bag.
I also want to carry a notebook with me, because I find I get inspired a lot when I’m out and about by various things, and by the time I get home I’ve completely forgotten what my awesome idea was.

5. Blog more.
I think you get the idea with that one.

And that ladies and gentlemen, is what I shall achieve in 2010. I hope this year kicks 2009’s butt. And that the new Doctor isn’t irritating or pretentious. David Tennant is a hard act to follow, and I’m keeping a neutral view until I’ve seen this new guy in action.

Commence preperations for rhumbling! (Earworm alert)

A gem for you, man pet.

Made by my lovely hubby, at my request. You’re welcome

Cheer up

I hate when people tell you to “just cheer up”. Because life is just that simple, isn’t it! But it is nice when people care enough to actually try and cheer you up. Ladies and gentlemen, I care.

Up first, a little something from Adam Buxton. As described on YouTube, “A short film by Adam Buxton dealing with the likelihood of a rat being able to control a cook and the ramifications thereof.” Pure genius.

Joe Cornish tells Adam an hilarious joke.

And Brian Blessed demands a roast (as Henry 8.0)

I hope these made you smile.

Techno Chicken blues

So, I’ve got this winter blues thing. Don’t know if it’s technically SAD, but I suspect so. The past 5 winters I’ve not been too well, last winter wasn’t as bad so I thought this year I’d be fine, but I actually feel pretty crap. I’m even considering registering with a GP here, which if you know me, is saying something. I’m trying to keep the happy face on, but it’s hard work. I’m proud that despite feeling awful I’ve not allowed myself to stay in bed or stay home from work. It’s getting harder though.

Random things that have made me cry today:
*Will Ferrell saying “her hair smells like cinnamon” in Anchorman
*Making a cup of tea
*Realising it was 4:30
*This:
That song and video is pretty much what you’d see if you looked into my mind when I’m happy regular Emma, and not stupid, teary, depressed Emma.

In other, better news, I sold my Big Bang Theory cross stitch on Etsy. That felt pretty damn good. I hope the buyer loves it like I did.

Sexism and anorexia

Two articles on the BBC new website made me raise an eyebrow today.

The first was regarding complaints of sexism against Philip Glenister’s line in the M&S Christmas tv advert.

(Skip to 00:37 for the offending line) I don’t find it sexist myself. Most people probably think of Gene Hunt when they see Glenister, and it really is something that character would say. It’s not even like he said it with a “phwoar” or a wink. And really, M&S adverts do tend to have the token lingerie model frolicking about. Also, would it be sexist if a woman made that comment about a man? Or would that just be “cheeky”? I wonder.
Full article here.

Secondly, Kate Moss is being bashed for apparently living by the motto “nothing tastes as good as skinny feels”. Charming. According to her agency, she “does not support this as a lifestyle choice.” Funny, because you just said…ah, forget it. It’s just thousands of young people you’re potentially influencing. Never mind, eh.
Full article here.

Happy Little Kawaii Poop cross stitch

I love this little guy. I suspect he shall be the first of a series. But I really need to concentrate on a few gifts for people before doing stuff purely for fun. Because we all know crafting poop is pure fun, right?
View his Etsy listing here

Festivities

The festive season is definitely in full swing! For the first time in years I’ve been out and sociable for both Halloween and Bonfire Night. I had a fantastic time for both. I dressed up for Halloween for the first time ever, I think. Proof:

Not the best costume ever, but it was a bit last minute, and had to be cheap. People seemed to like the green though (it took two baths and a shower to successfully remove it all!) I got horrendously drunk, danced terribly, and generally had a good time. I had a hangover from hell and a stomach bug on Sunday, so with the discomfort still fresh in my mind this weekend’s bonfire night fun was fuelled by tea and hot chocolate instead. I’m sure my liver thanks me for it. I watched fireworks properly for the first time in years, and frankly it was awesome. It was great to be surrounded by people I love, watching pretty explosives, and eating nommy chicken. Oh, and I got to pet an Alpaca! It was incredibly soft and gorgeous. And totally random.

So now it’s Christmas. Or as I prefer, Xmas. (“The x makes it sound cool.” 1000 points to anyone who gets the reference without Googling.) I’m not being a grumpy old woman about it this year. Well, nothing like I used to be. I quite like the idea of a non-religious celebration, to keep everyone feeling good during the cold and dark of winter. I just hate the music. Actually scratch that, I hate hearing the music 6 weeks before the actual holiday. I cant say I’m a big fan of Christmas music, purely because I’ve heard it all so damn much. I’ve worked in retail for the past 6000 years, 2 of those in a garden centre that turned into a “winter wonderland”, and 4 years in a supermarket. So I’ve heard it all, again and again and again… At least in the supermarket it’s not all seasonal music, it’s mixed in with regular music and adverts. The garden center was like musical torture with the same 24 tracks being played on repeat all day, every day. My minor grumbles aside, I’m actually planning on sending cards this year. My present plans have been pretty much thwarted by my financial situation, although I’m hoping to make a few bits and bobs for people. Maybe a Secret Santa arrangement is in order.
And then comes the New Year. I’m going to a friend’s sci fi/steam punk/cyber themed party. Costume ideas for a budget challenged, plump lady would be welcomed!

My first Etsy listing! Woohoo!

So I listed my Big Bang Theory cross stitch on Etsy. Yay me! Now someone just needs to buy it.
Here it is!

Rock, paper, scissors, lizard, Spock!

So, I’ve been working on this piece for a while. A long while. Although it’s really a very simple design, I just couldn’t get it in stitches the way I had it in my head. When I showed the first version to some friends, somebody guessed the images as “rock, marshmallow, key, lizard, fire.” Another friend suggested my scissors looked like a robot penis (which is actually a kind of cool idea, it’s on my inspiration list now.) So I nitpicked it over and over, until last Friday I was finally happy with the pictures. Then I knocked out the text, and voila. I can still see imperfections, I’m just hoping other people can’t, or don’t care.
This is the first piece I have stitched that wasn’t intended as a gift for someone, or for myself. I’m actually considering taking the plunge and listing it on Etsy, which is exciting and scary. I’m confident someone will appreciate the quote and will give it a good home. Even if it has to be me
Anyway, on to the pics..

In it's full 7x5 glory

Just the objects...

..and a close-up of the paper, since the line details didn't show too well in the other pics.

So, there we have it. Comments and criticism are muchly appreciated.
I love that crafting is a learning process, but so rewarding. I’m still pretty new to cross stitching and crafting in general. Some things I learnt from this project:
1) Be patient with yourself.
2) Take a break before getting frustrated. It’s hard to work well when you’re frustrated.
3) Metallic and pearlescent floss is a pain in the bum. I will learn to tame them though.

For those unfamiliar with the reference, here’s a clip from The Big Bang Theory, which is easily one of my favourite shows. (The quote is from the end of the episode, which I couldn’t find a clip of. It probably exists, but hey, I’m lazy)